The Flavour You Keep

There’s an old saying in East Asia: If you stay close to ink, you’ll turn black. In Korean, it’s called Geun-mok-ja-heuk — a reminder that we absorb the qualities of those we spend the most time with.

Today, those “close to” relationships aren’t just formed in person. We meet people in overlapping spaces — online communities, networking events, industry circles — often drawn by shared interests or by what we quietly hope to find in each other: opportunity, aesthetic inspiration, attraction, shared values. Over time, the habits, attitudes, and priorities of those we keep near us seep into our own lives. They shape our personal “flavour.”

In the startup world, there’s a shorthand for three distinct flavours: Mainstream, Maverick, and Wild Card:

• Mainstream plays by the rules: trust, transparency, steady growth.
• Maverick bends the rules for speed and opportunity.
• Wild Card ignores the rules entirely, relying on instinct and boldness.

Spend long enough in one world, and you’ll pick up its seasoning — discipline from the Mainstream, quick thinking from the Maverick, fearless energy from the Wild Card. But you may also pick up the weaknesses: hesitation, corner-cutting, or instability.

Where Algorithms Come In

In theory, the digital age should make it easier to experience a wide range of flavours. Algorithms could introduce us to people far outside our immediate circle — different industries, cultures, ways of thinking. In reality, most algorithms are trained to reinforce what we already like, want, or click on. Instead of tasting a wider menu, we’re often served more of the same dish.

This has a double effect:

• It strengthens our understanding of the world we already inhabit.
• It limits our exposure to different perspectives, making other flavours seem foreign, irrelevant, or even threatening.

When that happens, even meeting people offline can feel like confirming our existing views rather than challenging them.

The Question of Self-Interest

If self-interest is what draws us to people in the first place, does that mean we should avoid it? Not necessarily. Shared interests are what make relationships spark in the first place — they’re the bridge that allows trust to form. The risk comes when we only cross that bridge in one direction, toward people who mirror us too closely.

Choosing to meet people purely for self-interest narrows your flavour palette. Choosing to meet people who stretch your understanding — even if there’s no immediate benefit — broadens it. The first is efficient; the second is expansive.

The Balance

A well-balanced network is like a well-balanced meal: you need the comfort of the familiar and the challenge of the new. Too much of one flavour, and you miss the complexity. Too many competing flavours, and you lose the essence of who you are.

You can’t control every introduction, but you can decide which relationships you invest in deeply. Some will sharpen your skills, others will widen your view of the world. Both matter. Over time, the flavours you choose to keep will be the ones you serve to others.